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QB

Player	Team
Blake Bortles	Detroit Re-Tarts
Aaron Rodgers	Betty Whites Boobs
Ben Roethlisberger	AROB
Brock Osweiler	Drunken Bastard
Andy Dalton	Inglorious Staffords
Matthew Stafford	2 GOOD 4 U
Tom Brady	PainTrain 313
Tyrod Taylor	Tbone Terror
Carson Palmer	Mitch's Team
Cam Newton	BEARS DEN
Ryan Fitzpatrick	Blackball
Ryan Tannehill	StraightOutaCoughlin

WR

Player	Team
Emmanuel Sanders	Detroit Re-Tarts
Jarvis Landry	Betty Whites Boobs
Brandon Marshall	AROB
DeAndre Hopkins	Drunken Bastard
Demaryius Thomas	Inglorious Staffords
Jeremy Maclin	2 GOOD 4 U
Ted Ginn Jr.	PainTrain 313
Randall Cobb	Tbone Terror
Michael Crabtree	Mitch's Team
Tavon Austin	BEARS DEN
Anquan Boldin	Blackball
Calvin Johnson	StraightOutaCoughlin

WR

Player	Team
Sammy Watkins	Detroit Re-Tarts
Antonio Brown	Betty Whites Boobs
Brandin Cooks	AROB
Eric Decker	Drunken Bastard
Kamar Aiken	Inglorious Staffords
T.Y. Hilton	2 GOOD 4 U
Donte Moncrief	PainTrain 313
Larry Fitzgerald	Tbone Terror
Allen Robinson II	Mitch's Team
Jordan Matthews	BEARS DEN
Brandon LaFell	Blackball
Julio Jones	StraightOutaCoughlin

WR

Player	Team
Michael Floyd	Detroit Re-Tarts
Martavis Bryant	Betty Whites Boobs
James Jones	AROB
A.J. Green	Drunken Bastard
John Brown	Inglorious Staffords
Doug Baldwin	2 GOOD 4 U
Kendall Wright	PainTrain 313
Golden Tate	Tbone Terror
Nate Washington	Mitch's Team
Odell Beckham Jr.	BEARS DEN
Markus Wheaton	Blackball
Dwayne Harris	StraightOutaCoughlin

RB

Player	Team
DeMarco Murray	Detroit Re-Tarts
DeAngelo Williams	Betty Whites Boobs
Darren McFadden	AROB
Adrian Peterson	Drunken Bastard
T.J. Yeldon	Inglorious Staffords
Doug Martin	2 GOOD 4 U
Lamar Miller	PainTrain 313
Theo Riddick	Tbone Terror
David Johnson	Mitch's Team
Jeremy Hill	BEARS DEN
Todd Gurley	Blackball
Antonio Andrews	StraightOutaCoughlin

RB

Player	Team
Shane Vereen	Detroit Re-Tarts
Charcandrick West	Betty Whites Boobs
C.J. Anderson	AROB
Devonta Freeman	Drunken Bastard
Matt Forte	Inglorious Staffords
Ryan Mathews	2 GOOD 4 U
Jeremy Langford	PainTrain 313
Danny Woodhead	Tbone Terror
Alfred Blue	Mitch's Team
Andre Ellington	BEARS DEN
Isaiah Crowell	Blackball
James Starks	StraightOutaCoughlin

TE

Player	Team
Benjamin Watson	Detroit Re-Tarts
Greg Olsen	Betty Whites Boobs
Rob Gronkowski	AROB
Gary Barnidge	Drunken Bastard
Austin Seferian-Jenkins	Inglorious Staffords
Richard Rodgers	2 GOOD 4 U
Heath Miller	PainTrain 313
Delanie Walker	Tbone Terror
Julius Thomas	Mitch's Team
Jordan Reed	BEARS DEN
Antonio Gates	Blackball
Travis Kelce	StraightOutaCoughlin

W/R/T

Player	Team
Stepfan Taylor	Detroit Re-Tarts
Frank Gore	Betty Whites Boobs
Allen Hurns	AROB
Karlos Williams	Drunken Bastard
Javorius Allen	Inglorious Staffords
Shaun Draughn	2 GOOD 4 U
Jacob Tamme	PainTrain 313
Willie Snead IV	Tbone Terror
Chris Ivory	Mitch's Team
Ronnie Hillman	BEARS DEN
Alshon Jeffery	Blackball
Stefon Diggs	StraightOutaCoughlin

K

Player	Team
Mason Crosby	Detroit Re-Tarts
Cairo Santos	Betty Whites Boobs
Chris Boswell	AROB
Stephen Gostkowski	Drunken Bastard
Robbie Gould	Inglorious Staffords
Graham Gano	2 GOOD 4 U
Stephen Hauschka	PainTrain 313
Jason Myers	Tbone Terror
Justin Tucker	Mitch's Team
Chandler Catanzaro	BEARS DEN
Mike Nugent	Blackball
Sebastian Janikowski	StraightOutaCoughlin

DEF

Player	Team
Buffalo - DEF	Detroit Re-Tarts
Carolina - DEF	Betty Whites Boobs
Cincinnati - DEF	AROB
Houston - DEF	Drunken Bastard
Baltimore - DEF	Inglorious Staffords
Seattle - DEF	2 GOOD 4 U
Denver - DEF	PainTrain 313
Chicago - DEF	Tbone Terror
New York - DEF	Mitch's Team
Miami - DEF	BEARS DEN
New York - DEF	Blackball
Arizona - DEF	StraightOutaCoughlin